Resistance, Reluctance and Holding Back


Why do we often experience resistance to change when something new or different is presented to us, you know how we can often get that sense of reluctance or holding back?

The answer is this is normal!

As human beings we become comfortable with our self – beliefs and ways of living even if these thoughts and actions cause us distress because this is what we come to know and understand.

Any new idea, suggestion or event, challenges our ‘comfort zone’ so making any thought changes or new situations can be unsettling because our brain (own thought system) automatically responds to this change by saying, ‘hey I have no referencing for that in my memory pattern so best not go there!’ It is in fact our natural protection system which enables us to feel safe and in many dangerous situations and it has served us well. This is the ‘primeval’ part of our brain which is protecting us so that we can survive threats and unpleasant experiences and so triggers the ‘fight’ or ‘flight’ within us.

However, this ‘helpful’ instinctive response can also be unhelpful and hold us back from growing and developing as individuals in healthy ways and enjoying life.

As a therapist I have met many people who have initially been resistant to change and some who have even feared change. But this is absolutely okay because when they come to understand what is happening to them they become much more conscious of their own thinking and behaviours which means they have the power to make changes they really want, fully aware that at first it is, going to feel a bit, ‘funny’, ‘unusual’ or ‘strange’ as the new messages they are sending to their brains ‘settle in’, then the results become so liberating and rewarding. This is very much part of the healing therapeutic process whether it be through counselling, hypnotherapy or coaching.

So we can actually say thank you to resistance for it has given us the opportunity to ‘work on’ what we need to identify, as in what is not helpful in ourselves, in order to move forward in life and evolve into all that we want and can be!