What is Counselling?
Counselling comes under the umbrella term ‘talking therapies’ which allow you to discuss your concerns and any difficult feelings you are experiencing in a safe, confidential environment. The term can mean different things to different people, but in general it is a process to engage in when you want to make a change in your life or explore your thoughts and feelings in more depth.
How can counselling help you?
Counselling is useful if you want to explore the way you are thinking or feeling or if you are experiencing a problem or issue you want to resolve. You may choose to speak to a counsellor because you feel you cannot talk to your partner or family or friends about such personal issues or you may wish to speak to a skilled professional with an objective non-judgemental viewpoint. By engaging in counselling you need not worry about your private thoughts and information being passed on to others which may otherwise affect your job, family or relationships. You can be open and honest in a safe environment without having to worry about offending any one in your family, your partner, colleagues, friends or neighbours.
Counselling can help you to understand yourself better and the way you think, which will then help you develop a clearer understanding of your own problems. The more self-aware, reflective and insightful you become, the easier it is to overcome the difficulties you are facing so that eventually you will emerge feeling positive and empowered. Counselling can also help you understand other people’s viewpoints better, which can help you to understand the way you interpret their words or actions and improve relationships with others as well as with yourself.
In this way, as professional and experienced counsellors both of us, Joy and John always conduct ourselves ethically and in a friendly and pleasant manner. As ‘integrative’ and ‘eclectic’ therapeutic counsellors we use a variety of counselling models and techniques to meet your individual needs.
“Counselling and Psychotherapy are umbrella terms that cover a range of talking therapies. They are delivered by trained practitioners who work with people over a short or long term to help them bring about effective change or enhance their well being”
BACP (British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy)
Counselling Models and Theories
There are many different models and theories of counselling, such as the currently popular CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) Transnational Analysis (TA), Psychodynamic, Gestalt and Client Centred Therapy, to name but a few.
Many counsellors tend to favour one or maybe two of these models, but at Swans Therapy, we regard every client as an individual, with your own unique set of experiences and we feel very strongly that the treatment should be adapted to fit you the client and not the other way round. With this our main criteria, we use many different models, often utilising different techniques to best reach a resolution of your concerns. We may also suggest integrating hypnotherapy into the counselling sessions if we feel it would be of benefit and from experience we find that this can have excellent results.
Grief and Loss
Coming to terms with the death of a loved one is never easy. It takes an average of at least two years to fully recover from such a trauma and it can affect you in many different ways, both emotionally and physically. Bereavement counselling can be of enormous value in helping you through this most difficult period in your life. However, many other forms of loss can also have a devastating effect on your life. Losing your home or job for example or the loss of a loved one through the breakdown of a marriage, partnership, any relationship even a close friendship can leave you feeling lost, bewildered and unloved. Indeed any significant loss will have a detrimental effect on your normal life, leading to stress and all the problems that result from it.
Depression means very low moods and grief and loss are often the main triggers and cause of depression. Counselling is particularly rewarding, as talking things through and addressing your emotions with someone outside your circle of family and friends can be very helpful in these situations. As experienced counsellors, as well as being excellent listeners, we can give you gentle guidance and bring understanding. This can then help you to come to terms with your loss, and support you in your way forward.
Client Testimonial: Grief and Loss – B M Bournemouth
“I know I will never really get over the loss of my dad but when I found the right support and someone to help me to understand what I was going through, the grieving experience became less painful and I felt less isolated”
Feeling that our relationships are not as strong or happy and productive as we would like them to be whether they are personal relationships, friendships, family, work or social relationships is not at all unusual. When such problems arise it’s all too easy to seek someone to blame, either our partner or some outside influence or even ourselves. Then we may become either withdrawn or aggressive. Neither helps the situation of course and more often than not, only makes things worse. Unfortunately, resolving the situation becomes more and more difficult when every conversation ends in an argument. When we are thinking clearly we know that what is required is honesty, compromise and a willingness to change what is wrong. Sadly, knowing that is one thing. Bringing it about: That is the hardest part.
This is where Relationship Counselling can really help. It can be invaluable in resolving these problems. Being encouraged to talk openly to a professional non- judgmental counsellor who is outside the relationship can bring a different perspective and empower you to both attain the happy relationship that you really want.
Client Testimonial: Relationship couple counselling – Mr K & Ms A Wareham, Dorset
“We had decided to see a counsellor because we just was not communicating at all, for the sake our 3 children we decided to give it a go but not really hopeful. How wrong could we have been. We even began to look forward to the sessions together. If you are ever in doubt we would say just try it.”
Anger is not always a bad thing in itself. It all depends on how we manage it. It is a perfectly natural emotion and reaction to any situation with which we feel uncomfortable or unable to control. The anger often stems from frustration. Everyone has their own ways of coping with our anger, but when it is allowed to build up through a series of events it can then be both mentally and physically damaging for both ourselves and others around us. Counselling can help you, not only to remain in control of that anger, but to channel it in positive ways to resolve the issues that have created it.
Client Testimonial: Anger Management – Mr D. M. Ringwood
“I knew that if I didn’t do something to address my anger outbursts, I would push all my family away and lose the very people who are the most important to me. Within the counselling sessions I started to make sense of what it was triggering me to react in the ways I did. I found the whole process interesting and liberating. I learnt techniques to calm myself and be in control of myself. These have become less needed as I worked through what had really been making me angry and react which came from my past experiences. There is much more peace at home now and my children and wife enjoy spending more time with me now which is great.”
Stress and Anxiety
A person who didn’t feel stress at some level every day would be leading a very dull life! We actually need some stress in our lives in order to function properly and perform our daily tasks. Like anger it is a perfectly natural reaction to a given situation and not necessarily a bad thing if managed well. Again like anger, when it is allowed to build up without release it becomes a problem. Simply understanding the causes of stress and the effects it has on us can help us to reduce our stress levels (we naturally fear that which we don’t understand). Counselling can go further and teach you how to use that stress to your advantage, to help you to achieve goals, overcome challenges and enjoy success.
Client Testimonial: Anxiety & Poor Confidence – C. H. Bournemouth
“I have suffered with anxiety and low self-esteem since childhood and tried many ‘remedies’ to try to balance the never ending uncertainties that I feel. Joy has helped me immensely to overcome this, alleviating my concerns by making me understand the yin and yang of life, the dark and bright, complimenting each other during life’s challenges. She has helped me to have confidence to achieve and speak up and provided me with and advised me on techniques which will have a profound lifelong effect on my emotional well-being.”
Abuse & Trauma
Both of us, Joy and John have had extensive specialised training and experience with working therapeutically with adult survivors of childhood abuse. After four years as a one to one volunteer counsellor at DAA (Dorset Action on Abuse) Joy co – created and facilitated a group programme to support the non – abusive parents and carers of children that had been sexually abused. The success of this group led to the Joy becoming a founder member, trustee and chair for a new charity to help them establish themselves within the first 12 months while John continued to be a group facilitator for the men’s support group at DAA.
We understand the negative impact abuse and traumatic experiences can have on you and your life. We are very well trained and experienced in this specialised area of work so that we can help you to work through any childhood abuse, adult abuse, domestic abuse and trauma, to improve your sense of self–worth, self–confidence and self-esteem and to become more relaxed, calm and positive, and to experience healthy happy relationships. By regaining control of your life you can look forward to enjoying your future as you so deserve it to be.
Whether you have endured physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual or financial abuse these aspects of abuse are usually all inter-related. You may have endured a car accident or witnessed a terrifying event, the impact on you emotionally and psychologically are similar to being abused and a victim of violence. By engaging in Counselling and Psychotherapy you will be in a safe and confidential environment where you can voice your experiences to someone non- judgemental, who will support you appropriately and therapeutically to resolve any difficulties and in doing so you will move from survivor to thriver!
Many other Specific Areas of Treatments
Depression, Poor confidence and Low Self Esteem, An eating disorder, A fear or phobia, A habit or addiction, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Post -Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), coping with Long Term Illness etc.
Counselling and Psychotherapy can be used to resolve many issues and those on this page are just a small selection of what can be achieved. If you have a particular issue you would like to discuss, please contact us for a Free 20 min confidential consultation.